vaa.ci.vee : two poems

Ram Vishnubhotla (vishnurx@FRC.COM)
Tue, 30 Sep 1997 18:06:21 -0400 (EDT)


namastE!

When I first read this article I got really MAD.
The article with the above topic is really eating my brain since it got
posted. This article consists of two words that may offend some of our 
respected list members. So, please read it at your own interest.
____________________________________________________________________________

  Either I do not know how to read kavitalu and understand them or the 
author failed in conveying his theme. I'll be happy if the former is correct.

I do not have any objection for the use of the word vakshOjAlu in telugu 
literature when properly used in the right context. Now, my problem is 
how to understand the author. More than the word vakshOjAlu, what 
bothered me is the placemnt of the word "AbagA", and the use of the 
word "ataniki".

I tried to understand the author in three different ways. (I wrote this 
article before the title "onTari cEla madhya okaTE mana amma" is posted 
by Sri Vasu). 

1) The adult relationship between a man and woman.
2) The adult relationship between a man and woman and the relationship 
   between a child and its mother. 
3) The relationship between a child and its mother.

If the author meant the context 1 then I feel there is no need to write 
such a kavita.

If the author meant the kavita in the context of 2 and/or 3 then I feel that 
the author did not prepare proper ground for the reader to understand his 
views. "pAlinDlu" would have been a better word than "vakhOjAlu" in this 
kavita. A hungry child would not go for both "pAlinDlu". At any giventime 
the childs target is only one. If the child does not get enough milk in 
one, then he would go for the other. No wonder if this kavita misleads 
the reader. This usage, clearly shows the ignorance (or lack of 
knowledge) of the author about the topic.

(As a side note, Sri Jandhyala Papayya Sastry used the word "pAlinDlu" in 
kuntikumAri that brought no objection from anyone. He used it so 
effectively that we forget to notice it as breasts but we see them as organs 
of a mother that feed a baby. This is where I have a problem with the 
author vaa.ci.vee).

Read the kavita by replacing the word "ataniki" with "tanDriki". 
Then some of the misunderstanding is eliminated. This is where the author 
miserably failed in conveying his message. The word "ataniki" even makes 
the woman a vEsya.

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE AUTHORS PROBLEM IN USING THE WORD "tanDriki" 
INSTEAD OF "ataniki".

> 
> 2.
> 
> mancam paina parucukunna bhoomi laanTi duppaTi meeda amarcina
> aa renDu vakshoejaalnee
> aabagaa andukuni
> 'veeTini naa kicceyyi' annaanu.
> 
> caalaa kaalam kindaTa ataniki ceppinaTlae
                        ^^^^^^^
> 'teesukoe, avi neevae' andi, naatoe.
> 
> okka nishiddha phalam toe
> daevuNNi poegoTTu_kunnanu appuDU
> ee renDu phalaaltoe
> ninnoo daevuNNee andukunTaanippuDu.
> 

Now, if I were the editor/writer, I change the kavita as follows with as 
little change as possible. I changed the word "vakshOjAlu" with 
"pAlinDlu", changed the place of the word "AbagA" and replaced the word 
"ataniki" with "tanDriki".


mancam paina parucukunna bhoomi laanTi duppaTi meeda 
amarcina aa renDu pAlinDlanI andukuni
'veeTini naa kicceyyi' annaanu.

caalaa kaalam kindaTa tanDriki ceppinaTlae
'teesukoe, avi neevae' andi, AbagA unna naatoe.

okka nishiddha phalam toe
daevuNNi poegoTTu_kunnanu appuDU
ee renDu phalaaltoe
ninnoo daevuNNee andukunTaanippuDu.

Regards,
Ramanna

P.S:- I feel that any kavita should not mislead the reader when it comes 
to the relationship (physical) between a man/child and a woman.